Friday 28 November

We walked through occasional strong squalls, the wind out of the south. Kinda crazy. We saw no one except this older lady with a big dog that made Fergus -- and consequently Bella -- crazy, so I asked her please, could she just let us get by. She was one of those dog people that seem to think we were all going to meet up in a big happy group. Not.

Speaking, of dogs, I met N&L's new dog yesterday. He is not overly friendly but very sleek and handsome. The other dog, a year older, was his usual bright, alert, friendly self. We had a nice dinner at J's -- if a bit dispirited, all of our energies feeling tamped down by fatigue of one sort or another. But it was all fine, and companionable. We all knew each other well enough to feel comfortable even when the energy isn't all sparkly. It was fine. Tho I must say that after we got home and later when I went out to walk with the dogs, the world seemed gloomy and I felt on the knife edge of despair and found myself eager to get back to the light and warmth of the house.

It is still quite grey today but odd, and blustery, leading me to wonder if change is blowing in.

I plan to walk down to the bank and to the market, and to stop by work quickly to 'borrow' a stamp to mail my phone bill -- tho my phone is still not working and I have unplugged it so it won't disrupt the DSL connection anymore.

I slept in until 7 and it was delightful.

Now I see the briefest gleam of sun in the east, I wonder what this day will resolve itself into.

I also would like to get the fish tanks cleaned today. I didn't get to it last Sunday, what with all the cleaning I did to get the house fairly acceptable-- to me -- for M coming home. She will be back again in roughly 3 weeks for her winter break -- a month long break. She seems in very good spirits. College is good for her. She is spending tomorrow with FF.

It is so nice to have these 4 days off. I think I will cook a pot of beans today for burritos. J gave me a leftover donated turkey and I will cook that tomorrow when M isn't here. It's a turkey, of course -- albeit a small one -- it will still last me and the dogs some time and I am sure I will probably freeze parts of it.

I am nearly out of tea again -- I certainly go through 100 tea bags very quickly. Tho I always have loose tea of one sort or another but that is special and I drink it less frequently so that it will last longer. M has been enjoying the loose blood orange tea that J had given me at one point. I should offer her some of that very fine jasmine that I also have. She might like that too. Tho she has been quite happy with the blood orange tea.

I wonder what she will do this summer -- if she will be content to merely exist inside this very quiet life here, a life that has such clear limitations, or if her energy -- or boredom -- will goad her, propel her on into something active and interesting. I hope the latter, I truly do. She has already grown a lot, being at school, we shall see how much more she grows as the year progresses. Her appetite is much improved and she does look a bit filled out, which is also a great thing.

Anyway, I have finally made it to the last lines of these 3 pages and am free to move on!