Wednesday 3 December

There was a cat perched on the railing of the front porch when we got back, so of course Fergus needed to get back outside as soon as he could and bark. It's chilly but pleasant. Clear sky and frosty. We start out these mornings with clear skies, but by late afternoon, it is cloudy, tho I was able to see the new crescent moon as I walked home last night.

I slept well but had a sad dream about leaving the dogs behind somewhere, to be boarded while I made a long journey. But I couldn't stand the thought of being separated from them and became so terribly sad and upset. I woke then, because Topaz was scratching to be let out, but then I amended the dream to me changing plans and going back to get the dogs. I know this dream was set off by the novel I am reading. It is called 'Loving Frank" and is based on the life of a woman who had a long time affair with Frank Lloyd Wright and left her young children behind so as to be with him. That is the one part of the story that is almost intolerable to me, her leaving her kids like that, to pursue her own selfish desires, using female emancipation and true love and passion as an excuse. Selfish parents never seem to realize how fundamental, crucial, and life-determining the parent-child bond is, and how their actions shape and affect their children's lives. Anyway, that is what set off the dream, for certain. Thankfully I have learned to re-work dreams that upset me, to take control of them instead of them controlling me.

Another day. My main comfort is that when I come home, I can simply BE HOME. It's tomorrow I have choir, have to rush back out, and put on as best a face I can for people, but mostly to sing. Which I do love. Losing myself in the music and becoming a pure instrument. My throat isn't great this time of year, and I have to go easy on my voice, as I can lose it quickly if I expect too much sound, too much volume, too soon. Like any part of the body, it needs to be conditioned and not over exerted. I don't really sing much at all throughout the week, tho goodness knows, I talk enough. Using the voice effectively is a wonderful and fun thing.

Anyway, I have some heavy stuff to buy at the market, so it will be a bit of a trudge home.

We have our work dinner one week from tonight. I noticed J wrote it as 'Party' on her calendar, but to me it is no party, it is simply a work dinner. Both work, and dinner. I think they are tending towards the Dovegate this year which is fine with me -- it just means no margarita! I think the Dovegate has that fixed price deal on Wednesdays, and I think they are aiming at that. Tho they haven't come right out and said it, since E at work is clamoring like a child to go to Amigo's. And then, I wonder if CW will back out entirely, tho L is very good at corralling errant employees and getting them to go to these dinners. They are never what I would call fun. And being on a Wed night this year, it is probably well I won't get a giant blue margarita. If it is the fixed price deal, that means one glass of wine. I don't mind tho -- I always appreciate someone buying dinner for me.

Since I got back to washing Fergus again, he isn't itching as much. Doing it every night seems sufficient. I did Bella yesterday morning and plan to get her cleaned every morning. The spots on her back are worse despite the fact her fur has grown in so lush and thick.

The village has a boil water alert again, through tomorrow. I am glad I have my filter system. But it reminds me it is probably time to purchase a new filter.